Check out a highlight from last week’s podcast: Psalm 32 Explained: When Peace Disappears
—or at least I used to.
I hate mirrors—or at least I used to.
Growing up, I was the kid who wore “husky” jeans. Come to think of it, why did they even call them “husky”? Did the jean corporations have it in for me too? But I digress.
I remember being a twelve-year-old boy staring in the mirror with tears welling up in my eyes. I didn’t like the reflection at all, and I started to believe my weight was simply who I was. Even back then, I played sports at a pretty high level, but no matter how confident I felt on the field, it was always crushed by the identity I wrestled with when I looked in the mirror.
It got to the point where looking at my reflection—or even seeing pictures of myself—brought immediate condemnation. I truly believed the shell staring back at me was all there was to me, and that I was someone no one could ever love.
Fast forward fifteen years, and I still loathed seeing my reflection. That fixed mindset had taken full control of my life. I accepted that being overweight was just “the way it was.” It defined me. It became my identity.
I’d like to say that today I’ve completely overcome that hatred of mirrors, but that would be a lie. And that’s wild to admit, because fifteen years ago I actually stopped believing those lies and began to course-correct my health. There’s still room for improvement, sure—but physically, it’s night and day from where I used to be.
So why the lingering hatred of mirrors?
I think it comes down to this: I listened to those lies for so long that my mind sometimes still refuses to accept anything different. In Luke 6:45, Jesus says, “The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth what is evil; for his mouth speaks from that which fills his heart.”
For years, the “treasure” I stored up in my heart was negative self-talk and a broken identity. So naturally, whenever I looked in the mirror, that was the exact narrative that spoke back to me.
That’s why the promises of God’s Word are so crucial—and yet, sometimes so hard to accept. Scripture tells me that I am holy and blameless before Him.
Am I hearing that right? Holy and blameless? If that’s true, why is it still so tough to digest?
I think it’s because I believe me more than I believe God at times. And man… that’s hard to admit.
Maybe you can relate. Maybe no matter how many affirmations or biblical truths you hear, you still find a way to tear yourself down and render yourself obsolete.
My simple encouragement to you is this: God’s truth is louder than any lie we can tell ourselves. I’ve found that the only effective tool in combating “me” is Him—His Word, His truth, simply Him.
If you find yourself trapped in negative self-talk, or if mirrors stir up more shame than gratitude, I invite you to start filling your heart with what He says about you. Turn to Him. Only He can quiet the lies, clear out the bad treasure, and help you see the true identity He’s already spoken over your life.