In this episode:
We hope you guys are seeing that it is critical to not do life alone!
We are meant to be connected with other people and the weapon of isolation is impacting so many men. Pastor Brad Hoefs shared a powerful story with actionable tips for those suffering with mental health struggles.
Lions need to be having real conversations out of love. We don't shy away from it. That's what separates the men from the boys, and the key is don't do life alone. Click To TweetChris Grainger
Let’s jump into our scripture of the week. Okay. We’ve talked about it a lot. Romans eight 20. And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Great scripture right there in Romans again, spiritual kickoff earlier this week. I really unpacked that scripture.
So if you missed that episode, go check it out. Okay. Just two back. You should be there. And then that could give you some insight to understand some intake on Romans 8 28, which is such a powerful scripture, probably the greatest. Chapter in the Bible. I mean, it’s just unbelievable with the, the insight in Romans 8 28.
So, uh, highly encourages you to check out the spiritual kickoff, the conversation we had with pastor Brad. That was unbelievable. What, what insight, you know, we talked about some serious issues, fellas. I mean, I mean, we covered it all for mental health, the pornography, the suicide, the how you love others through it.
How do you help people that are struggling in, in their. How do you help yourself when you’re struggling in the sin? You know, pastor Brad, I mean, he talked about, you know, the mind is just what the brain does. And so many times people are shunned when they start talking about mental health and, uh, from, from his examples and churches, you know, it’s the, it’s the, it’s the disease that doesn’t get to Castros right.
You know, when somebody, if somebody dies or somebody there’s a sickness or things like that, you know, we know, particularly in, in, in the Baptist room, we’re gonna bring ’em a casserole and it’s usually gonna be a chicken casserole and they’re, and they’re usually pretty good. Not when it comes to mental health, you know, it’s just not talked about it’s hush, hush, just like pornography, hush, hush.
We’re not gonna talk about pornography. We’re not gonna talk about the guys that are, that are struggling with that, that are stuck. That don’t know how to get out of it, that their, that their marriages are suffering because you know, it’s, it’s causing physical issues because you know, that, that is, that has damaged.
And it’s damage them. And we guys, things we need to talk about or to suicide. I mentioned, I mentioned that example from the suicide, cuz guys don’t talk about it, but it’s real. So guys, we need to be having real conversations out of love obviously, but lions lean in and they have these conversations. They, they don’t, they don’t shy away from it.
I mean, that’s what separates, you know, the men from the boys and the key is, do not do life alone. That’s not the way it’s designed. Guys. I mean, pastor Brad, he unpacked a ton. He gave you guys a great opportunity to go through that, that fresh hope coaching, you know, look, look at. If all you do is learn how to have better conversations.
Maybe if you have teenagers or if you’re gonna have you have younger kids, they’re gonna be teenagers one day and you need to know how to have more in depth conversations with them to, to talk about their feelings. If they really be there to be that supportive bed, this could be a great way for you to learn.
And to get some tools and to kind of put those in your tool bag, you may not have to pull ’em out for five years. Maybe if you just had a baby, it may be 15, you’re just free. You have to pull those tools out, but you know what, if you got ’em, you can use ’em, you know, and I’d rather have ’em and not need ’em and need ’em and not have ’em that type of scenario.
Right. So guys, I high link, hopefully that that message, you know, with pastor Brad was encouraging that it brought you value that, that, that you feel that right now, You’re not alone. If you are struggling with something, that’s the main thing we want you to remember. So guys, you know, fun Fridays, I try to, to, to give you guys some tips, health, wealth, self, you know what the line within us is all about.
I’m gonna give you a health tip. You know, pastor Brad, we talked about stress and anxiety and all those things, and this is a, a tip that I’ve actually learned. And guys it’s great. And it’s super easy. Okay. And it’s called the 4 78, 4 78 breathing method. Okay. So what do you do with the 4 78 breathing? You inhale for four, uh, for count of four, you hold for count of seven and then you exhale, forcefully for a count of eight.
So you really need it. It takes practice. Okay. So, and you do that for four rounds. Okay. So you inhale for four hold for seven, but you, when you exhale, you really blow like with your diaphragm out of your mouth forcefully and that’s for count of eight and then you do it again. Cold blow 4, 7, 8, and just, just count the numbers guys.
I’m gonna tell you what it, it it’s, this is a, a, again, a proven psychological method that helps reduce stress, calm your anxiety. It puts you in a better mental state. You can even do this, you know, if you’re, if you’re at work and you’re stressed out, go to the bathroom, go to the bathroom. This is something you could do.
Just sitting down, just go sit in the bathroom and do this, this breath. It will lower your heart rate. There is proven, this is a method that guys I use. It’s something that, you know, sometimes I’m land in bed with my wife. And like I said, spend a long day and I’m just, maybe we’re amped up. We’re we’re working on podcast things or, or kid stuff right up to bedtime.
Right. And you just can’t shut that brain down. This is a tip. This is a method I’ve actually used in bed with her. And I’ll tell her, I’ll say back, you know, can, can we, can we breathe together? She knows, cuz we’ve learned this method together. All right, we’re gonna do the 4, 7, 8, and we do that or count four.
And usually at the end I make some joke to her, but it’s something that, that always brings a little bit of peace and calmness to our bedroom and, and just helps me really get ready to go to sleep. So guys, 4, 7, 8 breathing the me method. You can actually Google it. There’s a YouTube out. That as a doctor who walks through the method, if you wanna see it, I did just to kind of learn from at the beginning, but check that out and we’ll try to put that, that link in the show, in the show notes as well.
So you guys can go straight there. All right. For a well tip. Okay. We’re dealing with a lot of things right now. I get it with inflation, you know, and I know it’s crippling so many people, you know, the gas prices is unbelievable and not to mention grocery. You know, depending on when this drops, you know, right now there’s so many issues with form, with formula for baby formula, that’s impacting our family.
I get it. Stress is high sucks, but here’s one thing you can do to reduce that stress around inflation and things like that. When it, when it comes to your numbers, write ’em down. I know some of you guys like Chris, it makes no sense. I’m telling you guys write ’em down and then adjust at that. The mass sucks.
I get it. But if you know your numbers, it’s automatically gonna lower your stress and anxiety because why there’s no variable, you know, your numbers, your stress is going to go down and it’s going to open up opportunities for conversations on where and what adjustments you can make in your budget.
Based off the, the new math. I mean, quite frankly, for us, the grocery bill has gone up significantly. And the gas bill has. It has for everybody that’s gone up. So what have we had to do? We’ve had to adjust our spending in other areas because we don’t wanna stop our investments. You know, that, that monthly, and you definitely do not stop your giving guys.
And whoever guys need to hear that, do not start your giving. Remember guy first do not. Don’t just, just don’t do that, but you may need to adjust other areas. There may be things you need to cancel. You know, maybe, uh, there there’s certain streaming services or apps or, or monthly subscriptions that gotta go away.
But if you know your math, your stress will go down bottom line. So again, that’s a simple wealth tip and I, but I promise you, it will make it much easier for you and to have conversations and know where to make those adjustments, if you know your numbers. All right. For your self tip, all. I wanted to give you guys a tip for, for helping with your kids that may be dealing with stress or anxiety.
Cuz look, this is very common from kids, very early age kids, more and more studies. The more and more books I read on this stuff. It’s getting earlier and earlier, kids are dealing with stress and anxiety and a great method I learned about it is called the square breathing method square. Okay. So what you do, you put one finger on your.
And as you inhale, draw one line at a square, then you pause for three seconds and exhale. As you draw the, the second line, then you pause and draw the third line pause. Then draw that fourth. You make that connection and cool part with this, this method we call it’s called the square breathing, but it could be any shape.
Maybe your kids like stars or, or they wanna do rectangles. They wanna do triangles. It doesn’t matter. But that act of move of movement is going help. ’em the breathing is gonna help ’em again, kind like the, the 4, 7, 8 breathing. Method’s a little bit simpler, a little bit easier for kids to do this, but just draw a square right there on their thigh.
They can just put that finger on their leg, move it up, inhale, inhale. While that finger’s moving. Stop hold. As your finger moves again. Exhale. Stop hold over three. Inhale, as it goes down, stop, pull over three and back over and you can do that over and over, you know, but this is a method. This is something.
If you can get your kids learning how to do this, they can actually do this in the classroom. Cuz you don’t have to forcefully blow out. Like we’re doing in a 4, 7, 8 method. It’s more just breathing. Right. But it’s, it’s going, it’s gonna co it’s gonna bring everything down. Blood pressure, heart rate, you know, stress, anxiety.
Everything’s just gonna slow down a little. So maybe if they’re having a test, you can tell your kids, Hey, you know what, before your test do that square breathing, and that may just put them in a better mental state to be able to focus. So this could be something that, that you can really work with your kids on and any of those stressful situations, you know, if they learn these methods and they go on learn, they need to learn from you.
You’re their teacher, you are lying. And if they hear dad say this, or maybe they even see dad do this. There’d be more opt to lean in and start trying it themselves. So there you go. Square breathing method. Try that out with your kids. And again, Hey, maybe it works for you too. And you could do this right at work, sitting at your, at your cubicle, or maybe you’re out on a job site.
You know what? Breathing is a big, there’s a, there’s a lot of science behind. If we can. Manage our breathing, the stress goes down. So there are your three tips guys, 4, 7, 8 breathing method. Reduce that stress with, by knowing your numbers and the square breathing method. Try that with your kids. Okay. So for our books of the week, guys, no surprises here.
We have two books. First of all, the first book is from pastor Brad, fresh hope living well, in spite of a mental health diagnosis. What I like so much about pastor Brad, Book is that it’s, it has a, a lot of sections where you can actually write, so maybe you’re struggling something, it, it walks you through his thoughts.
Every chapter has scriptures, by the way, there’s tons of faith inspired and that gives you in here inspiration. And then he also has a, a psychiatrist that gives insight. It’s very interactive. It’s a easy read. I mean, there’s, there’s there’s you can take your time and kinda work through it. It’s almost like a workbook guys.
That you can have, but it, it gives you insight and maybe you’re not struggling with mental health. It can at least give you insight to what other people may be dealing with. And that may help you in the future. And then the second book holding to hope. This is one that he wrote with his wife. And this really is about how, if you’re a loved one, what can you do to get through it yourself, to support your spouse?
Obviously you wanna support whoever that loved one is maybe it’s not a spouse. You wanna support ’em, but at the same time, you gotta take care of yourself. So she walks through in this book, pretty heavy tips, things. She’s learned things she’s adopted to really be that support person, but at the same time, understanding her mental health and she’s gotta take care of herself.
So they’re your two books of the week. Guys go to the, the, the show notes, all that stuff synced up, you go straight, get those copies, add ’em to your library, highly encourage it. You know, again, pastor Brad, he opened up that opportunity for you guys to connect with him directly. You wanna check out the coaching program and things like that.
So hopefully enjoy these books. I enjoyed both of them. I thought they were both great reads, great resources. I’m glad they’re part of my personal library. All right. Fun Friday, you know, we’re gonna do some bad jokes, right? So it’s time for dad. Joke time. We’re gonna do two dad jokes. So dad joke number, number one.
What do you call a cow and a earthquake? Well, milkshake. Come on guys. You should know that one. What’s going on with you. All right. Number two. This is more for the engineers out there. Alright, so maybe the fellow math guys like myself who who’ve enjoyed that in time. So number two, what is a pumpkins circumference divided by a pumpkins diameter.
It’s pumpkin pie. Of course. So come on guys. All right. So if you guys don’t get that one, email me, I’ll walk you through it. Drop that one at the dinner table. Maybe it’s a great one for Thanksgiving or something, but there you go. Number one, what do you call a cow on earthquake, a milkshake. Number two, what’s a pumpkin, uh, pumpkins circumference divided by the pumpkins diameter, pumpkin pie.
So there you. Guys question a week. What is the purpose of hope in our lives? You know, as you’ve gone through we again, heavy topics this week, great scripture though, heavy topics you under need to understand hope and what that purpose is. And guys, if you’re struggling with hope right now, you’re at the right place.
Guys allow within us. We’re here to serve you. We’re here to help you. We’re here to give you encouragement. So I would highly encourage you right now. Go join the lion. It’s free jump on the website line within.us. Join that, go check out our blogs, go check out our resources, the Bible study. That could be some encouragement right there to help you grow.
You know, guys, I’m trying, I’m telling you, we’re, we’re really striving hard to serve you well, and to give you resources, that’s gonna help you. Okay. So again, the line within.us, if you want to be a, a donor and just support what we’re doing. There’s a Don there’s a donation tab. There you can, you can connect with us there, guys.
It’s all about serving you and trying to help, just trying to help you grow. So if you have ideas, there’s even a place where you can submit a question to the podcast. And if you submit a question, I promise you we will address it. And I’ll probably address ’em on, on fun Friday episodes. We will find time to put that in and go in and talk about the topics that you want us to talk.
So go check out our coaching program. Again, our resources, all that fun, that fun stuff. Give us a rating and review. That does make a big difference. So please, if you haven’t done that yet, please do. So, uh, guys, that, that, that’s a big one, for sure. So I pray this messages this week served you. Well, I pray that they’ve helped you.
I pray that they’ve given you some hope. Now we all need the. So guys, I hope you have a great weekend. Enjoy, remember those dead jokes, maybe the pumpkin pie doesn’t hit, but that milkshake one, if you got younger kids, that’d probably get some last all day long. And then you could take ’em to, to the, uh, you know, the local dairy cream or, or, or somewhere like that and get ’em a milkshake maybe Sonic and go from there.
So have a great weekend guys. Now go out and unleash the lion within.
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In true Fun Friday fashion Chris unpacks some Health, Wealth and Self tips and this week they all center on helping men lower their stress. There is too much coming at us on a regular basis and knowing how to manage this will do wonders for your overall mental health in the future.
Books of the week:
- Fresh Hope by Brad Hoefs
- Holding to Hope: Staying Sane While Loving Someone with a Mental Illness by Brad Hoefs
Be sure to grab a copy of Pastor Brad’s books as they are sure to help you (or those around you) that may struggle with these issues. The second book is phenomenal as it focuses on how mental health impacts loved ones and if that is you we high encourage you to add this to your library.
It wouldn’t be a Fun Friday without a few dad jokes and we hope they get some laughs at the dinner table. We pray the messages this week served you well and while not everyone is impacted with mental health issues having resources like this available is a great way to serve others when you run into this in real life.
Thank each and every one of you for the support and consider sharing this with someone that you feel would find value in this message. Blessings to you all and now it is time to unleash the Lion Within!
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